We all have a little hope. Hope for love, or freedom, or impact.
That hope becomes a goal.
Once you have a hope and a goal, you now have a PATH.
But what happens if your trajectory is a little bit off. You can be off 1 degree, and it will bring you to a completely different destination.
Some of you may have felt that as you started your doTERRA business or something else, you knew you had a hope and goals, so you started down the path.
I’ll tell you, if you are not clear on your why, you will be way off, and end up somewhere completely different than where you started.
You start your business. You start to feel lost. And you don’t even know why you are doing what you are doing.
Then in the moments that are difficult: People judge you, question you, you have disappointments. If your WHY is not driven by a very deep, knowing place in your soul, you will drop off.
SO HOW DO WE FIND THE RIGHT WHY?
You need to understand the BRAIN
Our neocortex processes information. Our LIMBIC brain controls ALL our decision making. It is emotional. Even if you THINK your reasons are logical, they are EMOTIONAL. This part of your brain has SO MUCH POWER. If you follow Dr. Joe Dispenza, speaking to this part of your brain can actually heal your body AND influence your reality.
So how do you speak to this part of your Brain? Here is an exercise.
1) Have a pen and paper – it will activate more neurons in your limbic brain.
2) Be COMPLETELY honest. (People want to share platitudes, and affirmations – be HONEST)
3) You NEED to open your mind and heart. In western society, we have lots of armour over our heart due to societal functioning. You need to open your heart and let it FLOW.
4) Don’t resist the emotion that comes up. It is the part of your brain that deals with pure feeling. It cannot even express in words – “I am trying to put into words” this means you are trying to express a limbic level thought. If get very emotional, it doesn’t mean you are EMO, it means you are in the RIGHT spot of the brain!
1) With pen in hand, write down the answer to this question: Why are you doing doTERRA as a business? Start with Because I:
(My personal answer: Because I want to create freedom for creativity and adventure)
This answer will be very surface and very logical. It could be a good slogan, or a good bumper sticker. This is your “fake why” because it does not go deep enough. Don’t be offended, this is a great place to START. But many people STOP here and you have to continue.
2) Why is this important to you? Write “Because I think”
(Mine was: Because I think that is the source of my happiness and it is how I can share happiness with others.)
Now you have JUSTIFIED how you feel about number 1. As soon as you have justified it, you have opened the door way to get to the emotions that guide your deepest why.
3) This is where most people get lost, get blocked and resist emotion. This is where we start to access your belief system. Review your answer in step 2: And answer: Why is that important to you? Begin answer with: Because I believe:
Before we go to step 4, we have to understand Maslow’s hierarchy of needs.
Everything that you do is actually in pursuit in one of the needs outlined in Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. If you have not heard of this, check it out on Wikipedia.
Once we feel psychological safe, we will take care of our safety, then love/belonging and so on. We are lucky that we live in a society where our basic needs are taken care of. You MUST understand that at the beginning of our journey are related to taking are of our CORE NEEDS.
Many WOMEN feel selfish about taking care of their core needs. That is is selfish. But if you are not TRUE TO YOUR CORE WHY, you will NOT BE ABLE TO HELP OTHERS WITH THEIRS.
It’s the oxygen mask analogy – you have to put yours on first.
4) When you were working on number 3, did you start to feel some emotion, or tinges on your heart. Your why is about YOU. Be completely open to emotion that means you are on the right path. But if you don’t feel emotion, that’s okay too. It might only come up when you vocalize it to someone else.
How did you come to know these things? It was probably some measure of darkness that helped you recognize light. It was some measure of bitterness that helped you recognize sweetness.
Start with: Because I know xxx
(Mine was: Because I know what it is like to feel alone, crazy, unwell, too much, bored, numb, and angry. And I also know what it feels like to feel validated, free, inspired and excited about life.)
YOUR WHY Is associated with your DEEPEST unmet need. As you have boiled it down and gotten to the core of it. Because we are emotional animals and we make decisions on how we feel. The deepest emotion we identify is our WHY.
NOW, don’t go out and tell everyone this deep core why. The words and phrases are for YOU and will help you put together a deep why that can also be appropriate to share.
NOW, if you are part time, make your WHY and share it with your mentor.
If you are FULL TIME, help at least one other person connect to their WHY by using this process.
To experience another example, listen to the 30 mins audio created by the Leaders Circle (it has a very beautiful example by a woman who had experienced a FIGHT to stay connected to her higher power.
My why: I am fighting to help people feel connected, inspired, supported and thriving.
Your why will shift and grow and thrive as you do.